#1 2008-09-24 16:01:30

passiflora

Member

Registered: 2008-09-24

Posts: 16

amazing butch dykes... ie, 0914

I totally thought 0914 was a really cute, young gay man (actually, I started wondering if it was wrong to get excited by such a young-looking guy... he didn't even have any facial hair!) and was thinking, was he getting fucked by a partner or just fucking the floor?

It was actually a really cute dyke. Her confessions are so interesting to me too because I'm really fascinated with strap-on sex and had a harness once too, I took a lot of time shopping for it but never used it. I threw it away, afraid my ex (who would have definitely been scared by it) would find it. I loved hearing all the insider tips and experiences on how to use them, and it was also interesting to hear how she didn't like to be touched... I never understood the "stone butch" mentality about this and I guess that what she is saying makes total sense... similar to how a guy who feels uncomfortable with his gender (or simply a pure bottom) might prefer to focus on his ass than his cock.

anyway, I liked her. I would date her.

Interesting observation... I'm here in the US and I keep hearing all these lovely tropical birds in all the videos. It's making me want to move down under!

0536

Member

Registered: 2007-02-01

Posts: 45

Re: amazing butch dykes... ie, 0914

Hey passiflora, I'm not sure that 0914 identifies as a butch dyke or a stone butch, just fyi - it's a great Confession though and a very sexy Agony.  0914 is someone who straddles gender boundaries in a way that can be challenging to others, which in my opinion presents a problem for the male-female divide with the setup of the Agony site.  It brings up an interesting question of whether / how to present someone in accordance with their preferred gender identity when we only have two of them listed here.  There have been other contributors who have provoked some thought on this as well, but I won't list them here because I can't assume that they would want to be singled out as such.  I specifically chose not to use a pronoun in talking about 0914 because I don't exactly know how 0914 would want to be spoken of here and can't really assign an identity for that person, just like we can't really say with certainty that this person is a stone butch or a butch dyke.

passiflora

Member

Registered: 2008-09-24

Posts: 16

Re: amazing butch dykes... ie, 0914

Hi 0536...

interesting response, I actually have thought the same myself as I have a lot of transgender friends. My main criticism is the idea of the site being divided so clearly as male/female. I did find some very feminine, possibly transgender (?) people in both sections, but it is hard to tell because of the setup of the site. And what about intersex people who choose not to pick one gender identity?

I guess a lot of people would think this isn't important, but to me it is because I am not really very concerned about natal gender, more gender expression (which can vary even in one person, as it does with me).

I didn't mean to imply that 0914 was specifically stone-butch identifying... I realize that stone butch is an identity of choice, and that some of the things she (? or the preferred gender identity she would choose) says that she enjoys sometimes, are not really stone-butch qualifying (when I think of "stone butch" I think of someone who doesn't want to be touched or seen naked, and definitely never penetrated, etc). But a lot of what she describes about herself in the confession, has some of that leaning... she said she preferred to imagine her body as it fits her mental conception of it rather than as what she was given, so she is self-conscious about being touched, etc. I can understand this too, as I tend to prefer gay men, and I am always self-conscious that my body lacks what they need (even if they are sometimes curious or interested in women, or are open to a woman top).

She sounds like she is very relaxed and at peace with herself, in any case, without hangups about her identity or even her body really. I think it is natural for a woman top to have some sensitivity about her body and genitals, but it is not unhealthy, just normal to have that self consciousness sometimes (even if she enjoys her body). There is much more expectation in a top, a penetrative lover to "perform" and satisfy, it is more like a learned skill where bottoming is considered to be more passive and intuitive. I disagree with this idea, but that's what we are raised to believe, I think (and I also think this is partly related to the belief that women are inferior, in general, to men).

Anyway, I would be friends with her. She was cool.