Ladies - Serious Question - Warm Up

northdallas1968 · 2006-01-04 20:37:49

As a man we were all taught by whoever gave us that special speech that a woman needed foreplay, lots of kissing and body contact to get things going in all the right areas. Most of us in our early teens suffered at least once from what happens when you skip that and go it dry.

All this being said, (And I realize we edit for time) but many of these ladies seem to start into the act pretty quickly and reach orgasm fairly quickly. Take our most recent (And let me say stunningly beautiful) Overkill. She is biting her lip in no time at all.

Is there a mental build up for a woman before masturbation? Does this serve to replace foreplay when your without a partner?

I know plenty of married women with kids with tool kits that would make a carpenter weep and they obviously don't have 15 minutes for build up and then another 15 for action and 10 for afterglow. (There are several women going - when do we get this ever?? (Laugh))

But seriously I am curious to learn.

Thanks in Advance

erdna · 2006-01-04 22:15:50

northdallas1968, I suspect when a girl is getting ready for BA submission, while setting up the tripod, camera, making sure she will be not disturbed and all the time knowing what she is about to do is exciting in itself. Preparation for such an action is arousing and I am sure when comes the time to start their agony they are already very wet if you see what I mean. If what you see from agonees is a 4 minutes clip, you can be sure they are busy for at least an hour to do so. Just like going out with a girl, having a good supper, romantic dancing and sexy conversation makes it all for the girl and the guy sexual arousing. They are both sexually ready provided no goof is made at the last moment.

PC elmo · 2006-01-05 03:41:16

I am curious about this as well. I'm sure the right frame of mind has a lot to do with it, but questions like this would be best answered by those who would know. I'd give it a week or so, and maybe one or two of the females on the forum might grace us with some insight....

PC elmo · 2006-01-05 03:43:21

! and re-reading the topic, I'm sure you mean "about the warm-up," rather than telling the ladies to warm up! :)

ruby · 2006-01-05 04:18:54

In my experience- warm up can be a very quick or a long process depending on many mitigating factors such as psychological state of mind, where i am in my cycle, comfort factors (ants crawling up my arse, for instance can set it back a few stages , amount of attraction and arousal towards my sexual partner or if alone fantasy themes etc. Sometimes I can feel very aroused and not be wet at all, other times I can be surprised to find myself wet when I dont feel particularly aroused. The deep ravine of the vagina can be difficult to understand sometimes too! So just cause we are dry doesnt mean that we dont feel it. Having said that there is nothing more detrimental to arousal than a being touched and rubbed whilst dry! Lubrication is a ladies best friend.

Garybob · 2006-01-05 05:50:32

ruby wrote:

In my experience- warm up can be a very quick or a long process depending on many mitigating factors such as psychological state of mind, where i am in my cycle, comfort factors (ants crawling up my arse, for instance can set it back a few stages , amount of attraction and arousal towards my sexual partner or if alone fantasy themes etc. Sometimes I can feel very aroused and not be wet at all, other times I can be surprised to find myself wet when I dont feel particularly aroused. The deep ravine of the vagina can be difficult to understand sometimes too! So just cause we are dry doesnt mean that we dont feel it. Having said that there is nothing more detrimental to arousal than a being touched and rubbed whilst dry! Lubrication is a ladies best friend.

GOT DAYUM!!!! Ants crawling up her ass!!! See, that why I stay the HELL away from hairy women!

erdna · 2006-01-05 05:58:09

PC elmo, nothing better than a woman to get that kind of explanation (thanks Ruby) but is that true that getting ready for something sexy (ie. a submission to BA) can be a source of sexual arousal ? What I can say from experience is that different women lubricate differently, some are real fountain while in some rare occasion some other stay almost dry.

Jo · 2006-01-05 22:46:21

ruby wrote:

In my experience- warm up can be a very quick or a long process depending on many mitigating factors such as psychological state of mind, where i am in my cycle...

Oh yes, mind is the best source of arousal. The power of imagination is a mighty thing. (apart from all bodyly signs...)

What I find interesting is the state of your cycle. Is it the days near your ovulation where you feel more aroused than when having your days? Or is it a random thing?

Garybob · 2006-01-06 03:29:29

Oh gee whiz!!!

erdna · 2006-01-07 06:01:25

Mind is sure the greatest source of arousal provided imagination fills up that source. And what makes imagination? Well, experience, seeing things happening, body or object being at rest or moving in association with our basic instincts like sexuality for instance. Imagination is our unconscious memory of what we have lived. The memory is there hidden in our mind but just a little thing happens in our life and click, our imagination gives us some thoughts or mental image or else. Getting maybe too far out!!!?? :rolleyes

Ell · 2006-01-07 07:22:00

At the risk of stating the obvious, sex with a partner is quite a different experience to masturbation - I have more intense clit based orgams alone. With my eyes closed and a favourite fantasy playing in my head I can mostly get myself to orgasm in about three minutes or so. If I'm reading or seeing something that particularly clicks with my own fantasies, same thing.

To get back to the question, I actually like sex to be foreplay, that "foreplay" is sex, that it doesn't move in a linear way, that fingers, tongues, hands, cocks, pussies etc are put to good use, that cock in pussy is not always the end of the act if you like.

erdna · 2006-01-07 18:47:21

Ell, your comments are really pertinent. We count on you to perfect our women knowledge especially concerning sexuality but not restricted to it. That foreplay you speak about is what we have to understand better since we, the men, are not scheduled the same way. I would say for us the idea is to have the girl having several orgasms (if she is of that type) provided from different ways and having our orgasm afterward and maybe try to get a simultaneaous one. But to reach that level, we have to be able to hold short for not coming too soon with the girl's help. Thanks Ell.

PC elmo · 2006-01-07 19:10:38

Ell wrote:

To get back to the question, I actually like sex to be foreplay, that "foreplay" is sex, that it doesn't move in a linear way, that fingers, tongues, hands, cocks, pussies etc are put to good use, that cock in pussy is not always the end of the act if you like.

I'm very glad to hear that. I've always found the model of a single male ejaculation defining a "sex act" as incomplete at best. Seeing the build-up and the releases, male AND female, as part of the same thing really brings up the power of excitement, and it deflates a false assumption that sex somehow ends with orgasm. I usually hear that women don't necessarily have to have an orgasm during intercourse to enjoy it, and it makes sense that the act would be very exciting, no matter how close she is to finishing. I've even heard of women who prefer to climax from oral sex and view the entire penetration phase of intercourse as foreplay!

Not moving in a linear way also corresponds to tidbits of sex advice, like calling the wife or girlfriend at work and telling her some of what you want to do to her that night or that weekend. Sex at its best has a timeless quality to it anyway, so any procedural limitation is likely artificial. Granted, intercourse works best after becoming fully aroused, but that arousal can include excitement from previous orgasms, especially for women! Even with men, I've heard that members that are too large, especially with girth, can be less of a burden to the woman after ejaculating once. Maybe that's nature's way of hinting to us that a full-length session of sex should be at least as long as it takes for a man after recharging at least once.

This reminds me of a line from a movie, but I know I'm not going to get it exactly. It's from one of the films called "Sirens," the one with Hugh Grant in it. His character is relating how another, very artistic-centered character would advise him on his marriage, that his relationship with his wife should be "a state of perpetual lovemaking." Something about that just sounds so right, and rings true with all that I've experienced and heard (and overheard).

Switching gears a little, there's been some talk about women preferring the term "pussy," and a lot of it makes sense to me. I don't really get, though, the appeal of the term "cock." Maybe that's just me.

Last edited by PC elmo (2006-01-09 20:19:19)

PC elmo · 2006-01-07 19:32:13

I'm always a little amused when it takes me so long to finish entering a post (get up to get a drink of water ...) that I find other new posts that were entered in the meantime!

As for not coming too soon, I think that non-linear idea is really the way to go. Talk about no pressure! Just try again. If what you're going for is the woman's setting off the man's, or even a simultaneous, all it really takes is once, right?

erdna · 2006-01-09 05:00:58

Ell, you said you use erotic books matching hopefully your fantaisies. Books are important to me especially the erotic ones. One of my favorite erotic book author is Juliet Hastings. Did you read anything from her? Give me please some suggestion of books. I will provide you with some suggestion as well if you want so. Which one is for you the greatest source of erotic inspiration? Thanks.

Jo · 2006-01-12 21:39:46

erdna wrote:

Ell, your comments are really pertinent. We count on you to perfect our women knowledge especially concerning sexuality but not restricted to it. That foreplay you speak about is what we have to understand better since we, the men, are not scheduled the same way. I would say for us the idea is to have the girl having several orgasms (if she is of that type) provided from different ways and having our orgasm afterward and maybe try to get a simultaneaous one. But to reach that level, we have to be able to hold short for not coming too soon with the girl's help. Thanks Ell.

Sorry erdna for bringing up this point, but why do you always gereralize and speak for us, the men and not for yourself?

Just a hint. Give it a thought, OK?

erdna · 2006-01-13 05:49:01

Jo, you are OK. Good analysis but wrong conclusion. It looks like I spoke for myself. I was too fast to answer. I should say "I" instead of "we". But I think I was trying not to generalize but to avoid speaking in a way like "I, me and myself". But the problem remains according to a lot complains from women. I really believe they can educate men concerning their sexuality. We can return the favor too.

Jo · 2006-01-14 18:59:27

erdna wrote:

Jo, you are OK. Good analysis but wrong conclusion. It looks like I spoke for myself. I was too fast to answer. I should say "I" instead of "we". But I think I was trying not to generalize but to avoid speaking in a way like "I, me and myself". But the problem remains according to a lot complains from women. I really believe they can educate men concerning their sexuality. We can return the favor too.

I know that you like to speak for yourself, erdna. But I really think its better to use the "I"-form than a "we". Any opinion must not necessarily be the opinion of all men...

OK, I leave this point now!

Me also, I believe that women can educate men concerning their sexuality. And, as always, it's a matter of communication. But I don't think it's a public communication (like in a forum) which will lead to success. Every woman is different (like every man also!). Confidence is an important fact in this subject and I don't think that a public discussion will bring you the key to female sexuality. Ok, I paint black...

Looking and hearing what others have to tell voluntarily, are some small views in a big theme...

Hear, read and enjoy!

erdna · 2006-01-15 06:27:38

Jo, knowledge can be obtained everywhere from anybody at the most unexpected time. In sexuality or many other subjects women like few on this forum can be very interesting to listen to. Internet is anonymous and sometimes allows things impossible to live in the real life. This forum is a nice place to share all kind of ideas. For sure it's public but anonymous too. I am born in a very conservative environment and I can tell you that books and movies have helped me a lot. Theory is better than nothing. Or you have to accept what Ell or Ruby said that boys should be initiated by women a bit older than them which I agree and can tell that at, say, 17, I was more than ready for that but it just didn't happen. I understand that nothing is better than the reality but when you get knowledge from a book or movie or forum that something exists, you are way more prepared than ignoring it. Just listen to the girls about what they say on the carnal knowledge of the men and you will understand.
BA is a good example. When looking at the agonies you learn a lot of things and for some rooky it's a real revelation. Women in their agonee can be silent or verbal, soft or hard, intense or very discreet. This is body language and they tell us a lot. The confessions and this forum are just another way (a good way) to communicate.:)

PC elmo · 2006-01-16 03:10:08

I agree. Especially with this:

erdna wrote:

...
I understand that nothing is better than the reality but when you get knowledge from a book or movie or forum that something exists, you are way more prepared than ignoring it.
...

That's worth emphasizing. It pays to pay attention, and not always in ways we'd expect. It's a good habit.

erdna · 2006-01-16 19:11:31

Thanks PC elmo, knowledge dispels fear, at least most of the time.
And what does the fear make us do? Being not tolerant, suffering no critic, being narrow minded, being racist, being religious beyond any common sense (sort of integrist) ... just name it.

#1 2006-01-04 20:37:49

Ladies - Serious Question - Warm Up

#2 2006-01-04 22:15:50

Re: Ladies - Serious Question - Warm Up

#3 2006-01-05 03:41:16

Re: Ladies - Serious Question - Warm Up

#4 2006-01-05 03:43:21

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#5 2006-01-05 04:18:54

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#6 2006-01-05 05:50:32

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#7 2006-01-05 05:58:09

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#8 2006-01-05 22:46:21

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#9 2006-01-06 03:29:29

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#10 2006-01-07 06:01:25

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#11 2006-01-07 07:22:00

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#12 2006-01-07 18:47:21

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#13 2006-01-07 19:10:38

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#15 2006-01-09 05:00:58

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#16 2006-01-12 21:39:46

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#17 2006-01-13 05:49:01

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